Lights up:            T M C is standing alone, scribbling in her notebook.  She is behind stage, and there are racks of costumes, cases of musical intsterments,                             ect. 

 

 

                            COOKIE enters.

 

 

COOKIE:

 

Um ... T M C?  I haven't heard anything about a rehersal.  When is it?

 

T M C:

 

What's a rehersal?

 

COOKIE:

 

You know, practicing before we perform?  Aren't you directing it?

 

T M C:

 

Why do we need to practice?  It's ad libbed anyway.  I mean, you do know how it goes right?  You've seen the movie?

 

COOKIE:

 

But --

 

T M C:

 

Well, okay, I can give you a basic run down.  I've got time.  Act one, scene one.  A cute little town in Kansas.  Or Kansas City.

 

I GOT TO KANSAS CITY ON A FRIDEE

BY SATURDEE I LEARNED A THING OR TWO

CAUSE UP TO THEN I DIDN'T HAVE AN IDEE

OF WHAT THE MODERN WORLD WAS COMIN TOO

 

That's my favorite musical ever.  Oklahoma!  They're doing it next week.  But anyway, little Dorothy -- you -- is hanging out.

 

 

T M C

 

SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW

OH LOOK, A STORM

THERE IT GOES, TAKING MY HOUSE

AND THE WORLD STARTS TO TRANSFORM

 

(T M C hurridly pulls on a large sweatshirt and drops to her knees)

 

T M C

 

WELCOME TO MUNCHKIN LAND

TO MUNCHKIN LAND, TO MUNCHKIN LAND

WELCOME TO MUCHKIN LAND

WHERE WE ARE REALLY SHORT

 

DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD

WHICH OLD WITCH? THE WICKED WITCH

DING DONG THE WICKED WITCH IS DEAD

 

SHE'S GONE WHERE THE GOBLINS GO

BELOW BELOW BELOW, YO HO

AND SING ABOUT IT ...

 

FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD

FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD

FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW

FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD

 

FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK, YELLOW BRICK ROAD

FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK, YELLOW BRICK ROAD

FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW

 

Well, you get the idea.  (STANDS UP)

 

Intermission.  The best fifteen minutes of the show.

 

(T M C flips through a show thingamabob, whatever they're called.)

 

T M C

 

Whoa.  I didn't know you were in Harry Potter the Musical.  (Flips another page)  Oh my god.  My face shot.  I don't look like that anymore!

 

Oh yeah, gotta change my costume before we start. 

 

(Rips off sweatshirt)

 

T M C

 

IF I ONLY HAD A HEART

AND I ONLY HAD A BRAIN

AND I ONLY HAD SOME COURAGE

I COULD DRIVE THE GIRLS INSANE

 

NOW

WE'RE

OFF TO SEE THE WIZARD

THE WONDERFUL WIZARD OF OZ

THE WIZARD OF OZ IS ONE BECAUSE

BECAUSE BECAUSE BECAUSE BECAUSE

 

OH LOOK AT THE MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN

NOW WE'RE NEVER GOING HOME AND THAT'S FOR CERTAIN

 

DING DONG WE KILLED THE WITCH

WHICH OLD WITCH? THE OTHER WITCH

DING DONG WE KILLED THE WICKED WITCH!

 

THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME, THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME

THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HO OH OH OH OME!

 

Oh yeah, it was just a dream.  What a stupid ending.  Oh well.  The end.  Don't forget to buy a sweatshirt on the way out.

 

(to Cookie)

 

So anyway, have fun rehearsing, Cookie.

 

(T M C exits, singing to herself)

 

PUTTING IT TOGETHER!  BIT BY BIT!  OUNCE BY OUNCE!